15 May 2007

aloha hammy!

a good welcome to my beloved virtual hamster..
my good friend, 'who' used to hear my stories of glitch,my sorrow..when im back at its side..
being a 'loner', makes u feel that everyone would judge u by ur look, what u say, ur actions..etc..but being able to talk to hammies (kiddy,sammy,teddy,cuteypie..etc), relieve the stress out..allowing it to flow, when u touch the smoothness of the fur, watch the cuteness of the hammy..uhuhu~ i miss my hamsters..

Back in those days, i didn't look having hamsters is a gift from my Most Beloved.. I thought, this is an animal, which is there on the earth, for people who care for them, like them, appreciate them..
Now, being here in melbourne for almost one and a half years, make me realize a fundamental thing, in being here in this world.
I need nothing else, no one helps, except Him, my Beloved..

Although i was brought up without feelings towards human(i used to be n0n-sensitive towards humans reactions n behaviors), He gave me, to born with, a sensitive feeling towards animals, cute cuddly one, such as the kittens, chipmunks(i need to keep this for a pet one day), hamsters, mice,etc..

Those who know me back in those days, will realize if not remember that, the people around refer me as the snow queen ; its not that im like a queen, it because im expressionless.. seriously, Im not joking.. When people make me angry,sad,happy, i used to keep a straight face. No frown nor smile would ever paint on my face.. Owh.. i dont think i could stand keeping expressionless face now..hihi.. This evidently occur when i starts to enter lower high school at such a young age.. i was 11yrs old!!! And from all-gurlz school to a blend of genders..what a shock..!

Thus, because of the traumatic exchange, i forced myself to be resilience. I act tough n rough at the present of the opposite genders, and vice-versa when they are not. Hey, i used to be a soft,delicate child..seriously..even though i often hurt myself..(lots of cuts n bruises)..hihi
And, Ta-Da..this is what become of me now.. I cant reverse myself to be more lady-like..gentle.. and expressionless..

One thing that used to bug me.. If someone put my life at stack, and ask me to choose between a good friend of mine, and my cats, UH~~~ i thought, if this really happen one day, i wont have any friends after this..Coz, as i mentioned earlier..my affection towards animals is way2 more than to homosapiens.. But, that wat then..

Now, the relationshipsFillah with others, make me realize, "Yeah, you can love animals as much as u can, but u need to know the precedence list of life.

Other duty calls, which certainly has higher precedence that this blog..

"O Allah, ur servant here, are bound to be forgetful. For thus, i ask only from You, and no others, to remember what i forget, to ensure im not lost in this challenging world, to take my life away when i remember u the most, with my level of eeman is the highest. i yearn for ur rahmat', i long for ur paradise..to meet my Creator, You, O' Allah.."

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