lately, my legs are not doing well..

and it kind of making me sad..

i thought as i grow up older, i'll be the one who'll assist my mum in walking and moving due to her old age.. yet, i'm the one who is dependent on walking and moving while im still young, in mid 20's..

thought i can still walk despite being slow and all, how will i do as i grow older..

now i wonder, does this happen to me becoz of any specific reasons ..?

when i was still in school backthen, i can roam and run around freely around,,

i can cycle with joy..

yet, i could not do so now..

i wonder... and i'll keep on wonder.. hmmm

the fasting month has almost come to the end..

come to think about it.. i wonder why and why..

in this bless month, one ought to gave beneficial things in it..

yet, the more i choose to get closer to Him, more people, friends are running further away from me..

it must be my fault. my one wrong doing..

but what was it..?

i need to reflect and reflect this back why does it occur...

till then.. O Lord, please bless me with Your Love and Your creatures love..

setiap tahun, masuk bulan ramadhan.. aku pasti akan alami perkara yang sama..

apabila masuk kepada waktu2 berbuka.. aku pasti akan sakit kepala..

dan ia memang sangat sakit.. hendak kata disebabkan aku berpuasa pada pagi hari, kalau ikutkan, aku pernah juga puasa2 pada hari di luar bulan ramadhan..

ntahlah.. aku boleh sahaja kalau sakit kepada tika berbuka.. yang aku sedih, sakitnya bertambah ketika hendak solat.. lebih2 lagi hendak solat tarawikh..

pada tahun2 sebelumnya, aku boleh juga ke masjid untuk tunaikan solat tarawikh di sana.. tapi sejak tahun lepas, aku tak berani nk ke masjid, disebabkan sakit kepala aku ni..

nak kata ini helah shaitan, bulan ramadhan, shaitan dah ikat, dibelenggu.. supaya tak dapat nak menganggu umat islam ketika puasa..

kalau difikir2kan balik, aku pernah mengalami sakit kepala ketika sujud di sekolah dahulu, semasa di tingkatan 2,3.. kira 13,14 tahun dahulu.. tapi itu aku hanya abaikan..

tapi kini, aku tahu, penyakit aku itulah yang mungkin penyebabnya..

walahuálam.. aku kini, hanya mampu solat dirumah sahaja masa bulan ramdhan ini.

hanya harap, Allah menerima akan amalku seadanya..

O Lord, if everything that You had lay it out for me is a sign for me to go, do let me leave in peace with full of Your pleasure in my life to this very day..

if indeed my time to go has come to tow..

do forgive me Lord, purify my deeds from leaving it rot..

accept my faith as it reach its peak..
save me from slipping down as i walk on the thinnest string...

i might not conveyed my deepest love to You..

knowing Your love is way up high, beyond the horizon sky..

hope its enough to bound me in to enter Your paradise..

rasa seperti mcm nk kena osteoporosis pada usia yang suku abad ini.. mintak dijauhkan Allah daripada menghadapinya..

wow.. it has been more than 4 months i've written something here..

well, it might be becoz i either did not have the mood the write.. or i did'nt have anything to shout it loud here..

at work, the past couple of weeks are the most hectic time i guess..

since there's only 4 of us in specific sector, and 1 of us are warded because of an injury and the other 1 is always out to meet client, it only left to us both.. while the work is coming on heavier and heavier each week..

and from both of us who are available in the office, 1 have other work to focus too.. and sadly, it left me alone to carry out all..

well, it's not that i'm whining or anything.. as believe it or not, i somehow enjoyed these busy weeks...

rather than the days where there are no work to be done.. and waiting for time to pass by..

and to be exact, out of the 8 works, there's left only two to be done..

today, the one who meets the clients return to the office, i willingly give one of my unfinished work to him as to be truth, i actually only have a vague idea on how to run it..

or else, i certainly love finished it voluntarily..

honestly, im a person who like to start a job, and finish it well, without delay and without putting on burden to others..

and there's only 1 more work i need to finish it out by end of this week,,

All Mighty Lord, Allah SwTaála, please ease me my work.. as my work is solely with the intention for Your Pleasure..