everyday i keep on questioning myself.. why me?

out of those people out there at that time, why did it have to be me..?

and today as i read on this verse from the One who choose me to deal with it, i then realise, there u go..

"And when Allah intends for a people ill, there is no repelling it"

there are sins which will keep on haunting me... and i guess, the illness i have to face for my entire lifetime is a punishment of the sins i've commited..

yet, i keep on trying to improve myself of not making more sins, yet the pain will be the one to keep on haunting me..

give me strength my Lord..

lately, my legs are not doing well..

and it kind of making me sad..

i thought as i grow up older, i'll be the one who'll assist my mum in walking and moving due to her old age.. yet, i'm the one who is dependent on walking and moving while im still young, in mid 20's..

thought i can still walk despite being slow and all, how will i do as i grow older..

now i wonder, does this happen to me becoz of any specific reasons ..?

when i was still in school backthen, i can roam and run around freely around,,

i can cycle with joy..

yet, i could not do so now..

i wonder... and i'll keep on wonder.. hmmm